Soon after he kicked me in my face and left me to die on the side of the road, telling me I was trash after using me all up I realized he was right, I soon would be nothing but a Dirty Talking Women whore. I never woke up from that nightmare, I had no choice but to continue to shoot up, he was more turned on when I was high for him. I also loved it because it numbed the pain just a little bit. He was spitting on my face, kicking me over and over and I could feel the bleed dripping all over my body. A lifetime of treating people like shit, a lifetime of not giving a damn about others, a lifetime of being a complete bitch to others had caught up with me. This was my Karma, this is what has become of me and as I lay there taking it there was nothing I could do about it. This is what I deserved! I’d rather do some Dirty phone talk instead of having my ass beat, be forced to clean the toilet with my tongue and be forced to also clean my shit off of their cocks. I am kept drugged up, I am kept being used and put in my place. He broke me, he showed me what I really am, he brought all my self-loathing to the surface and now all I crave is more junk in my veins, and more bruises on my flesh. Just like I’ve said before, this is what forever I say in my head. Over and over I repeat this to myself this is my life this is my karma. He is using his shoelaces to choke me now, I fade in and out of consciousness, I feel so weak, so worthless, so fucking powerless. I feel like a trash junky whore, and I am if you think about it.
Chelsea
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